Our opening number is a very twisted dance to “One” from A Chorus Line. I’m calling it now; only Mia would take such a classic and do it up like this. It’s really captivating. And I called the choreographer—yay!
We’re celebrating our 100th episode tonight. Mia says she loves the babies coming back to the nest and getting nominated for Emmys and such. Mary says this show means the world to her, and has changed her life, getting all weepy in the process. Nigel says TV at its best can reach out and unite a nation, and he feels like that happens on this show. Well—I do love our SYTYCD conversations, y’all, but I don’t know if Nigel’s the Great Uniter or anything. Easy with the pats on your own back!
We see highlights from the past five seasons. Why don’t we have people who can spin on their head this season!?!?! It’s just not the same.
Recap of last night. Breast cancer dance makes me cry again!
The four girls learn their fate. Melissa—is safe! She’s shocked, and so thrilled. I’m pretty shocked too. Kayla and Janette are in the bottom two this week. NOOOO not Janette!! Kayla I can see—she’s great, but it’s not like we see her “growing as an artist” or whatever.
Our first of three dances from previous seasons is up; it’s the flower and the hummingbird dance. I actually never saw this the first time around. Wade choreographed it, and it’s very interesting. No wonder it won an Emmy!
The guys are next. Ade is safe, and Jason is in the bottom two. Brandon and Evan are left, and Evan…is safe?? That’s…odd. I actually started typing “and Evan is in our bottom two” because I just assumed. Maybe his fan base was angered by the unfair criticism of his eyelids?
Our second routine of the night is “the bench” routine that garnered an Emmy for Mia. It’s still amazing.
The bottom four perform their solos. Really nothing new to say on this. Although last night, I thought that Kayla almost fell over a few times, and it turns out, that was part of the choreography. Which might explain why she’s in the bottom tonight?
Our last dance is Ramalama, another Emmy winning dance from Wade. And he’s dancing in it! They are dressed like Elizabethan era zombies and it is fanfreakingtastic. Their entrance on the stairs prompts my hubby and me to make plans for a stair dance off over the weekend. He is so going down in big huge flames.
And now we’re back with Katie Holmes, finally! Seriously, we’ve been hearing about this for how long now? Katie looks crazy skinny. I haven’t seen her in anything since Dawson’s Creek, so it’s hard for me to see her looking all Joey Potter and think that she’s married to Tom Cruise and is a momma to adorable Suri. She’s going to be dancing AND singing. Did you know Katie Holmes could sing? I had zero idea. Given that they’ve beaten us over the head with the fact that THE Katie Holmes is going to perform on the show tonight pretty much all season, I’m expecting a production along the lines of the Central Park scene from Enchanted. It opens with some 1920’s car pulling up, and Katie gets out and lip syncs beautifully. I do have to say, she sings well. Then we switch to some cloud set—are we supposed to think this is live?—and she’s dancing in a Chicagoesque costume with a bunch of guys. I don’t know anything about Katie’s dance training, but all she’s doing is flicking her leg around, doing a glorified grapevine, and pulling her hat over her eyes. The highlight of this routine is a lift consisting of no less than four men hoisting Katie up in some Jesus on the cross formation. It’s not thrilling. So back when I took choreography, we had entire shows revolving around choreography for everyone—the professors wanted to make sure that we could make ANYONE look like they could dance. Did Tyce skip that class? Is he spoiled by working with only trained dancers? Because I kind of think I read about Katie taking dance classes in my US Weekly, and it certainly didn’t show in this dance.
We learn which girl is going home, and it’s Janette. NOooooo!!!! She’s my favorite!!Cat, who seems truly fond of her, gives her like eighteen kisses. The judges give her a standing ovation. Nigel says that she was his favorite too, and he wanted her to win. Well maybe you should have SPOKEN UP and we wouldn’t be in this situation! Oh…do you think the judges go home and vote?
Our bottom two guys are next. Jason is going home. I suppose it’s time. His farewell video reveals that he was one sock guy during auditions. Oh! I totally remember him now!
Remind me to vote next week—I can’t believe Janette is gone!!!
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